Weight Loss Jealousy

Do any of you have someone who is (not so secretly) jealous of your weight loss?

I do. My sister and a friend of mine.

My sister has struggled with her weight all of her life and has tried every diet know to man, not to mention diet pills and herbal remedies.  She isn't willing to do the work (counting calories and exercising) and never loses weight to speak of yet she is constantly "on a diet."  She just had two knees replaced due to her obesity and still has changed nothing about her lifestyle. At this point, I think she's in denial.  Occasionally she'll ask me how I'm doing with my weight loss and when I tell her she doesn't say much. When I hit the 30 pound lost mark she just said, "Good for you" but I could hear the jealousy in her voice and she quickly changed the subject.  I know that she wants me to remain fat right along with her.

The friend that I mentioned is obese and is the woman that I used to walk with back in late winter/early spring. She is oblivious about what it takes to lose weight and, also, unwilling to do the work.  We walked together for about 3 months and then she stopped because she wasn't seeing results and got discouraged. She admitted that she thought with just walking alone (and not getting her food in check) she thought that the weight would "just melt off" (her exact words). After we quit walking I went on to lose 30 pounds and she remains the same, if not heavier.  She is another one that I can just tell by her tone that she is jealous.

I think the real reason that people get so jealous is because they are disappointed in themselves and when they see someone else losing weight and starting to look and feel good, it makes them take a good look at themselves and they don't want to deal with it or do the work that it takes so it comes out as jealousy. Makes me want to leave them in my fat dust clouds ;)

Have any of you had someone jealous of your weight loss?

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I'm still covering two offices. Ugh. One good thing is that I'm leaving work an hour early today and meeting my DD for dinner...not sure where yet, though.

I bought a larger data package for my ipad today so I will have connectivity at home :)

I'm back down to 227. Finally.

Make it a great day!

Busy

I'm slammed at work - covering for my supervisor while she's out. It's not making the time go any faster though.

I lost .8 of the mysterious weight gain. Nothing I can do but keep at it and try not to sweat it.

I've been slacking with exercise lately, I just feel lazy. I know I'll feel better and have more energy if I do it so I must force it tonight. Maybe a walk outside in the fresh air.

I'm off to see what everyone's up to. Work can wait a few minutes ;)

Trying New Foods

I had a nice relaxing weekend.  My daughter treated me to a manicure and pedicure at the beautiful day spa where she works. Later that afternoon she came over and we had a nice visit. Yesterday I didn't do much at all. I did do a little exercise (arms and squats) and my eating was on point all weekend.  I thought for sure I was going to see a drop on the scale this morning but it was actually up 1.4! WTH??? When I saw that I could have screamed because there is no logical reason for the scale to be up that much. There is no way that I ate that many calories - I could see a small fluctuation, but 1.4? IDK wth is going on.  I just gotta keep at it and hope for a big drop tomorrow.  I'm just going by the way my clothes and shoes fit. Yes shoes - my feet are shrinking too! :D

NSV:  My DD told me that after I left the spa that a woman that she works with asked her how much weight I lost and that I really look good. Yay!

 

 

Little by little I'm changing my food over to more healthy options.  I bought coconut oil to try.  I'm not at all familiar with it but have heard that it's supposed to be more healthy. EVOO is still my go-to, but I was curious about coconut oil and since I've been hearing a lot about it, I decided to give it a try. What's surprising is that it is in solid form and doesn't smell like coconut at all - it doesn't smell like anything, and the texture is not as smooth.  I used it to sautee green peppers and I like it. This 16 oz. jar cost $3.99, not bad at all.  Anyone else have any advice/thoughts on coconut oil?

 

I've also subscribed to Mark's Daily Apple and now have a ton of reading to catch up on about primal eating.  I've been reading it here and there for a while but I thought it was time to subscribe.

 

I can't believe that Thursday is August already! This year is flying by.

 

That's it for now.  Make it a great day!

YAY for Friday!

The scale is down .6 so hurray for that.

Not much happening here. Our heat wave finally broke and we've actually been below the average temperature. We've been in the low 80's and it feels wonderful.  Today I get off work at noon so I'm going to go walking outside and get some fresh air and clear my mind this afternoon. My goal is to get the scale to go down by Monday.

The weekend will be quiet. I'm scheduled for a pedicure tomorrow since I cancelled my appointment last week for the yard sale; that's all I have going on.

Have a great weekend all! :)

I Cannot Have Any Sugar

I made the mistake of making Coffee Granita the other day. I thought it would be refreshing and light, and it was. I cut the sugar down to ¼ cup for the whole recipe and omitted the liqueur and whipped cream. It came out perfectly and was delicious.  I ate about a cup last evening and I found myself back in the freezer for more and more. Apparently the little bit of sugar was enough to trigger terrible cravings. I hate that uncontrollable feeling. I ended up dumping the rest of it down the sink. I still have the urge to reach for something sweet this morning and I'll probably be fighting the cravings for the next couple of days. Ugh! Not. Worth. It.

A couple of days ago I noticed that I got cravings from a piece of Doublemint gum, too. Wth? I just feel better the whole way around when I omit all sugar. I don't want to fall back down that slippery slope of cravings and feeling powerless to food. I must maintain control.

The scale has been back and forth for about a week between the same two pounds (228-230); that tells me that I need to track my food more carefully. I've also been slipping in the exercise department for the past several days. Time to get the scale going downward again instead of maintaining.

Thanks to all for the wonderful advice yesterday. It sure helps to get different perspectives.

Let's make it a great day :)

Old Maid Syndrome?

I've been thinking about something lately. I'm getting ready to turn 45 in September. I've been single for 6 years. I haven't had one date since I left my husband 6 years ago. Not one. Will I be single forever? I don't want to be. It's scary to think of dating after all this time and especially now being fat. Let me back up a little...

I met my ex-husband when I was 20, got married when I was 22 and had my daughter when I was 23. We stayed married for 16 years. I think we got married too young and didn't really know how to make a relationship work so the marriage started to crumble around year 13, but we tried to hang on and make it work. Sadly we couldn't.

I was thin when I met my husband and was thin for most of the marriage. Towards the end I would eat emotionally for comfort from my failing marriage and started gaining weight. Then my mom died and I gained even more weight. My ex despised that I gained weight and would make cracks about how he won't have a fat girl for a wife - so I ate more. That showed him didn't it? The marriage continued to deteriorate.

Finally I couldn't take any more and moved out with my DD. More emotional eating and weight gain. I'd never lived on my own before and I was afraid of the unknown. Funny, after I moved out my ex and I got along good - there was no more pressure to make it work with him and I only had to answer to me now. I started following WW and exercising and weight loss followed. My ex would come to pick up my DD and would hang around long after he should have gone, bought me presents and even called to tell me that he missed me. Too little too late...the feelings were gone.

I continued to drop the weight and went on to lose 63 pounds in 2009-2010. I was still low on confidence and wouldn't go anywhere to socialize or meet friends let alone men. I'm an introvert and was mostly satisfied to be a homebody. I would talk with men but due to my low self esteem, I would quickly retreat at any sign of flirting. After all, who would want a fat divorcee?

Fast forward to 2013 and I've gained the weight back (half of which is now back off) and I'm still alone, still an introverted homebody and growing older by the minute with an empty nest. It's time for a change. I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life. It's time to get a life. But how do I get back out in the dating world as a fat woman without having an official date in 24 years? O.M.G!!!

Talk about scary! here are some of the thoughts that run through my head:

• I wonder how I really look to men and what they think of me.
• Even though I'm losing weight what will they think when they find out that I used to weigh 258 pounds. Will they be an ass like my ex - afraid of having a fat girl?
• Afraid of someone to see me naked again.
• I'll never find anyone "good". After all, you gotta' have good bait to catch a big fish, right?

Then on the other hand I think:

• Why are you selling yourself short? You're not as bad as you think.
• There are plenty of fat women that I see with good looking men - if they can find someone so can I. Did they find them as fat girls or did they get fat while they were with them?
• Why do I think that fat girls are unworthy of love???

Then I think: It's my low self esteem talking. I'm not as bad as I think. I'm halfway attractive, I have a good job, a nice house and car, good morals and sense of humor, don't drink or smoke, I'm working on bettering myself inside and out, I'm a good mother....Why am I selling myself short? When I compare myself to some other women I know, hell, I'm a prize! LOL

Anyway, it's a lot to think about. I guess I'll just continue to work on myself inside and out and the confidence will come and hopefully that will attract someone. But I realize that I have to be open to catching someone's eye, to maybe saying "hello" first. To getting out the house and being seen.

It's time for me to be happy and live for me. Time to share my life with/look forward to spending time with someone again.

Time to lose this weight and find myself.

Randomness

I've been busy lately and haven't had a chance to post.

The weekend was good, we had a yard sale and made a couple bucks while getting rid of unwanted junk. DD and I discovered a new, cute café where I got a delicious Greek salad. We also went to a flea market, it was fun to browse.

Yesterday I woke up so lazy and tired so I decided at the last minute to take a vacation day and slept in. I got an idea to upgrade my car so I got preapproved at my bank and then visited 3 car lots yesterday and test drove a 2011 Nissan Altima. Very nice. After some figuring I decided to wait until I have a little more equity built up in my current vehicle so I can get a better deal.

Eating has been good, I haven't been exercising but I've been doing a lot of running around and being active. The scale is down a pound from the last time I weighed in, so all is well. Today isn't as hot as it has been so I think I'll walk this evening.

I need to get caught up with this pile on my desk my co-worker won't be here for the rest of the week and I'll be covering for her also.

That's it for now. I'm off to see what everyone else is up to.