This mornings weight = 240.2 (I'm really surpried it's not more.)
Today classes started back at the university where I work, so the rat race has returned.
I finally exercised yesterday. I could feel myself slipping into a rut/semi-depression or whatever and I knew that I needed to get off my ass and start making stuff happen for myself. The pity party is over. I knew that I would feel better to get out in the sunshine and fresh air. I made myself start taking my vitamins again, too. I'm sure that vitamin D and iron will help with my energy level, which seems to be non-existant.
I got up early yesterday morning and sat outside in the peace and quiet and watched the sun rise with a cup of coffee. It was nice to just be. Just to watch the clouds drift. Then I walked for a mile in the park. This park had hills and I was huffing and puffing with all of the weight that I'd gained back. I thought back to when I lost the 65 pounds and got down to 179. I would sometimes walk 7 miles a day and I had so much energy, now I feel like passing out after one mile. It makes me sick. I'm the only one to blame.
My DD invited me over for lunch and we visited for a while and then we went for a walk at a different park near her house. It felt good to get moving again and to get out of the house. Tonight I will force myself to exercise again for at least 30 minutes. I used to exercise every day religiously. I was on such a good routine. I would get home from work, eat dinner and then exercise. I wouldn't allow myself to sit down and watch tv or get side tracked doing something else until I exercised. That is when I was in the groove and the weight was peeling off nicely. I'd love to be like that again. What's stopping me, you ask? Only myself. I know that I'm worth it - worth getting healthy, being fit, slim and attractive. Why do I let food have control over me? Food that makes me fat, unhealthy and lathargic. It's not worth it. It's SO NOT WORTH IT! I know this and yet I continue on this nauseating roller coaster. But not for long.
It's a great day to be alive. Let's enjoy it!
You can do it!! Fake it 'til you make it!! :)
ReplyDeleteYay--sounds like a good plan. It's crazy, but I know exactly what you're talking about. When we're losing, we get into a groove and the groove keeps us moving in the right direction, but once we lose the groove, it's not just about deciding to recommit, but trying to find the groove again...crazy!
ReplyDeleteYou are worth it!
You can get back to those 7 miles a day! But I can relate, too. Sometimes I feel like passing out after a mile too! :)
ReplyDelete